Chuck Norris facts!

[BengDogg]

Got sent this link, funny as hell http://www.4q.cc/chuck/index.php?topthirty check the mr t and vin deisel top 30 too

[Narc]

Aye, they are ****ing hilarious!

[the block]

chuck ones are the best, then vin diesel then mr t.

[BengDogg]

One that did make me laugh was

Mr T is allergic to doors, thats why he has to kick them down

[the block]

i thought these were quite funny:

"Chuck Norris lost his virginity before his dad did"

"Mr. T once took a crap at a party in New York City. Afraid of being killed if you flushed it, people left it alone. The poop sat in that toilet for nine months. That is how Puff Daddy was born."

"Mr. T was fired from the Psychic Friends Network for always predicting pain."

theres lllooooaaaaddddssss. i think they keep getting updated.

[uk machine]

funny

[PikeKing]

http://www.youtube.com/w/The-most-powerful-man-on-earth?v=SZ07nYEHB3s&search=chuck%20norris

[PikeKing]

http://www.youtube.com/w/Silent-Fight?v=aJFGKAd3n28&search=chuck%20norris

[Taz]

Just to tag on 20 facts about Mr T:

Before Mr.T was born there were only 25 letters in the alphabet.
One night Mr. T took a 10 p.m. train home. He still refuses to give it back.
Mr. T destroyed the periodic table, saying Mr. T. only recognizes the element of surprise.
Mr. T hates playing 'Rock Paper Scissors' because he doesn't believe anything could beat rock. He always chooses rock, and when someone throws paper, he says," I win." If someone is foolish enough to dispute this, he takes his clenched fist and punches them in the face, then says, "I thought your paper would protect you."
Mr. T has removed Pee Wee Herman from existence for making fun of his cereal.
Mr. T can walk on water. He can also walk on fire. His preference however, is to walk on fools.
Mr. T scared the black out of Michael Jackson.
Every time a church bell rings, Mr. T pities a fool.
As a child MR. T used to go into the sewers of NY and hunt alligators. I know what you are thinking: “There are no alligators in the sewers of NY”. Yeah...Now!
Mr. T speaks only when necessary. His main form of communication is folding his arms and slowly shaking his head. And regardless of the situation, he is always understood.
The last man who made eye contact with Mr. T was Ray Charles.
Google won't search for Mr. T because it knows you don't find Mr. T, he finds you.
When Mr. T folds his arms, the U.S. Terror Alert Level is raised to gold.
Mr. T thinks Cotton is for wusses, therefore his clothes are made of 100% children.
When Mr. T received his star on Hollywood's Walk of Fame, he made his hand prints after the cement was dry.
Mr. T doesn't pity anyone who likes the Black Eyed Peas. He just kills them.
Mr T once punched his way back to the 80's just to kill Richard Simmonds
Mr. T was almost involved in a second car crash. To avoid the crash, he folded his arms and slowly shook his head. The car decided it was safer to avoid Mr. T.
Death is Mr. T's way of saying 'Slow the **** down'.
Mr. T walked in front of a speeding bus. Needless to say, he was charged with 7 counts of manslaughter.
He who disagrees with Mr. T in private, call him a fool. He who disagrees with Mr. T in public, call him an ambulance.
Someone once suggested that Mr. T's first name is Pit. His body was found 10 seconds later. The police concluded that he committed suicide by stabbing himself with a Mohawk 389 times, choking himself with a gold chain and by eating both of his own legs.
Mr. T once fell into a pool of lava. He nearly drowned.
The last time Mr.T went hunting he got a 10 point buck, a white rhino and two bald eagles... He is no longer allowed into the Zoo.
Mr. T coined the phrase, "I see dead people," after the waiting staff at Denny's forgot his birthday.
Contrary to popular belief, Mr. T was not beat by Sylvester Stallone in Rocky III. He actually lost to Stallone's stuntman, Chuck Norris. It took 5 hours of work by a dozen makeup artists to make Chuck Norris ugly enough to be a believable Stallone. Even with Chuck Norris, it was still necessary to use 3 metric tons of animal tranquilizers to knock Mr. T out long enough for a 10 count.
A common and widespread form of capital punishment in olden times was known as "pitification", where fools, sometimes in large numbers were brought before Mr. T and pitied to death. Later, the process was deemed too messy and inhumane. Thus, impalement and crucifixion were invented.
A common and widespread form of capital punishment in olden times was known as "pitification", where fools, sometimes in large numbers were brought before Mr. T and pitied to death. Later, the process was deemed too messy and inhumane. Thus, impalement and crucifixion were invented.
Mr. T once ate four 72 oz. steaks in 12 minutes. He spent the first 5 minutes laughing at the fact it takes Chuck Norris fifteen minutes to eat three.
Mr. T hates golf so much, he smacked half the black out of Tiger Woods.

[PikeKing]

http://www.funmansion.com/html/fm-Norris-Top-Ten.html

[bunnyluva]

I don't know if this has been posted before, I've stopped reading all the Chuck posts but came across this showing the man himself reading some of his own facts.

http://www.thesuperficial.com/

On the front page atm

Phil